Chastity Lifestyle Blog By Experienced Sex Educators

Forget Hallmark Holidays. National Kink Day is here on October 6! This year feels especially relevant for CB-X and our community because of a major reveal about kinky preferences across the United States. Earlier this year, Clips4Sale released its 2025 Fetish of the Year report. If you’re new to the name, Clips4Sale is an adult clip marketplace where independent creators sell kink and fetish content to audiences worldwide. They’ve been a major pay site in the industry since 2003, long before free tube sites like PornHub reshaped adult video consumption.  Side note! Before we dive into the C4S insights, let’s clarify kink v. fetish terminology. People often use “kink” and “fetish” like they mean the same thing, but they’re different. In this blog, we will stick to “fetish” since that’s the word Clips4Sale used in their findings. What’s the Difference Between a Kink and a Fetish? A Kinkster Explains “A kink is a turn on that is typically ‘out of the ordinary’ that enhances sexual pleasure. A fetish turns you on regardless of context. I have a kink for feet because, for me, pretty feet make a girl hotter. I don't have a fetish because I don't get turned on just by seeing feet and I don't ever find women attractive solely because they have pretty feet (pun intended).” (All semantics aside, our kink = transforming numbers into narratives. If data makes you horny, too, browse a huge catalog of various PornHub Insights or C4S’ recap of how online sex has changed the world over 20 years.) From Niche to Numero Uno If you guessed chastity was the big winner, give yourself a gold star! Out of all the leather, latex, feet, and rope devotees, chastity snapped the lock as the Top Fetish of 2025! For context, PornHub Insights has shown Hentai holding the crown as the most-searched keyword in recent years. However, as an adult content paysite (not a tube site), C4S’s data offers a different lens by highlighting the p0rn clips that people are actually buying. And that’s where things get interesting. At first glance, the results might surprise people outside of the kink community. Chastity has been considered a deep-cut kink, tucked away in the corners of online forums and sex toy shops for a long time.  Chastity emerging from the dungeon and into the daylight? We love to see it. Worried chastity might lose its edge because it’s trending upward? Nah. It’s less like a bandwagon and more like your favorite indie band finally getting the recognition they deserve.  Silver & Bronze The two runners-up: cuckold and gooning. Cuckold play continues to draw attention for the way it blends voyeurism and power dynamics, which resonate across mainstream porn and personal relationships. Gooning has exploded in popularity over the last few years, moving from niche forums into the larger kink conversation. Its focus on edging, trance-like states, and obsession with porn consumption has created a subculture all its own, reflecting how far people are willing to push the boundaries of arousal and control. The United States of Fetish Clips4Sale also compiled the highest-searched fetishes on their porn clips across the U.S. in its "Fetish Map of the United States". We see you, Nebraska!  More Kinky Data: Clips4Sale’s 2025 “United States of Fetish” Map - a separate report that revealed the most searched-for fetishes in each U.S. state. Variety is...the Whole Point What we learned from the findings: more people are leaning into the dynamic power exchange of lock-and-key play. A chastity device is a symbol; chastity play is an act of surrender, discipline, and erotic curiosity all rolled into one. And when you think about it like that, it’s no wonder chastity is having a mainstream moment.  Celebrating National Kink Day means shining a light on the spectrum of interests that make up kink culture. Some gravitate toward high-gloss latex and rope suspensions, others to roleplay or spanking. And now we know there’s a growing wave of people who’d rather click a lock shut and see what happens when orgasm isn’t the end goal.  Curiosity wins, discovery wins, acceptance wins. National Kink Day in a nutshell, y'all. Embrace your Kinky side and enjoy 15% off any products from the CB-X Kink Boutique! Use code 2025KINKDAYDISCOUNT at checkout to unlock your exclusive discount. (offer valid 10/6 - 10/10/2025)

We get tons of questions about prostate play, especially from chastity wearers who've discovered that locked-up pleasure requires some creative problem-solving. This Anal August, we're breaking down everything you need to know about prostate pleasure. Your regular equipment might be out of commission, but your P-spot is ready to step up as the A-player. If you'd rather skip the pep talk and get straight to the butt stuff, browse our curated Anal August 2025 Product Guides to find exactly what you're looking for.  Best Vibrating Prostate Toys for Men Best Non-Vibrating Prostate Toys for Men Pegging Sex Toys for Couples Best Anal Play Toys for Beginners Anal Sex Toys for Sissies Fun and Unique Anal Toys to Putt in Your Butt 1. The Prostate is a Second Pleasure Center (And It’s Way More Powerful Than You Think) Here's something that might blow your mind: the penis glans has around 4,000 highly concentrated nerve endings, making it incredibly sensitive to direct touch. However, the prostate connects to entirely different nerve pathways that can create full-body sensations. What that means: the prostate's connection to the pelvic nerve and hypogastric nerve means it's deeply wired into your body's arousal and orgasm systems in a different way. This creates a fundamentally different type of pleasure. Let that sink in. While penile stimulation is intense and localized, prostate stimulation taps into nerve pathways that can trigger whole-body responses and multiple types of orgasmic sensations. For chastity wearers, this is particularly revolutionary. While traditional penis stimulation might be off-limits, prostate orgasms offer a completely different type of release. Unlike orgasms that typically result in that familiar post-climax crash, prostate orgasms can be multiple, longer-lasting, and won't kill your arousal or submissive energy. Many chastity couples report that prostate play actually enhances their dynamic rather than disrupting it. The locked partner stays engaged, attentive, and eager to please while still experiencing incredible pleasure. It's the best of both worlds: intense satisfaction without losing that focused, submissive headspace that makes chastity play so psychologically compelling. 2. Prostate Orgasms Are Wildly Different Than Traditional Orgasms Here’s the truth that you might not be ready to hear yet: Many men report that once they perfect prostate stimulation, it becomes their preferred method of climax. Male orgasms are often described as more intense, more satisfying, and infinitely more interesting than what they experienced before. If you're expecting prostate orgasms to feel like regular orgasms, prepare to have your expectations completely shattered. Some men describe prostate orgasms as a full-body experience that starts deep in your core and radiates outward. Instead of the quick, intense spike of a traditional orgasm, prostate pleasure builds in waves that can last significantly longer. For couples exploring chastity dynamics, this discovery can be relationship-changing. The locked partner gets to experience incredible pleasure while maintaining that psychological state that makes them attentive and focused on their partner's needs. And – no refractory period means the fun doesn't have to stop. That heightened arousal can continue for hours, or even days. 3. No, You Don’t Need to Be "Into Anal" to Enjoy Prostate Play Here's where we bust the biggest myth about prostate stimulation: you don't need to identify as someone who's "into anal play" to unleash your prostate's pleasure potential. Many men who never considered themselves interested in anal stimulation find that targeted P-Spot massage feels completely different from what they expected. The key difference is intention and technique. Prostate play isn't about penetration for its own sake. It's about accessing a specific area that responds to pressure, vibration, and targeted stimulation. Many prostate toys are designed specifically for this purpose, with ergonomically-curved shapes and targeted vibration patterns that focus on pleasure rather than just penetration. For beginners, focus on external massage before moving to internal stimulation. The prostate can actually be stimulated externally by applying pressure to the perineum (the area between your testicles and anus). This can be a great way to explore these sensations without any penetration at all. Essential Best Practices for Prostate Play Always, always, always mind rule number 1: Invest in proper anal toys. Prostate-specific massagers are designed with the right curves and safety features. Look for toys with flared bases to prevent any unwanted disappearing acts, like the fist-shaped dildon't pictured in an unfortunate X-ray image (photo credit unknown). Try a set of anal beads and work your way up over time.  Never go without lube again! The anal area doesn't self-lubricate, so quality lubricant isn't optional. Silicone-based lubes tend to last longer and provide better cushioning for extended play. However, silicone lube isn't compatible with silicone sex toys, so be sure to use a hybrid lube (water-based + silicone or aloe) if you want the thicker, longer-lasting texture that silicone is known for.  Start slow and communicate constantly. Whether you're flying solo or with a partner, pay attention to your body's responses. What feels good? What doesn't? This type of play requires patience and self-awareness. Don't hold your breath. Seriously - exhale through your mouth for a count of 4-5 during each thrust. Deep exhales help the body relax and loosen up, so focus on your breathing during anal sex to maintain comfort.  Hygiene matters, but don't overthink it. A simple shower and basic cleanliness are usually sufficient. Enemas aren't necessary for most prostate play, especially with smaller toys.  The Bottom Line Do you hear that? Listen closer. It's your prostate, and it's saying "put me in, coach!"  Your prostate has been patiently waiting for an introduction, and Anal August is the perfect reason to finally make its acquaintance. Remember: good things come to those who go deeper. 

Today we are observing one final sex-positive holiday in July to cap the month off with a bang! Or, in this case, a perfectly ruined one. Thursday, July 31 is National Orgasm Day, a celebration of explosive sexual satisfaction. For the chastity community, this observance hits a little differently. When it comes to chastity orgasms, some say that  chastity"rules" permit orgasms entirely, because "what's the point of being in chastity, then?"  Is it against the rules to have a chastity orgasm?  Depends on who you ask.  We’ve said it once, and we’ll keep saying it until we’re blue in the balls: having a chastity orgasm comes down to personal preference, lifestyle, relationship dynamics, and consent, of course.  For kinky chastity play folks who do include or permit orgasms in their situation or relationship, the approach is often strategic and intentional. All chastity orgasms are not created equal, and understanding the different types can help you explore or discover what works best for your dynamic. How are orgasms different from ejaculation? For male orgasms, there is a difference between orgasms and ejaculation. Orgasms are a result of intense pleasure and pelvic contractions. Otherwise known as the peak of climax and toe-curling release you feel when you come. Ejaculation is purely physical; the expulsion of semen from the penis. What are the different types of orgasms?  Beyond traditional orgasms, chastity enthusiasts explore various types of release including sissygasms (prostate-only orgasms achieved through anal stimulation), forced orgasms (continued stimulation past the point of comfort), nipplegasms (climax achieved through nipple stimulation alone), and ruined orgasms (interrupted climax that leaves you wanting more). Each type of orgasm can serve a different psychological and physical purpose in power exchange dynamics. Enter the ruined orgasm, which can be one of the most powerful tools in a D/s dynamic. What is a ruined orgasm?  In the world of ruined orgasms, the journey outweighs the destination. In a few words, ruined orgasms are typically defined by an unexpected interruption during orgasm. For couples exploring chastity, ruined orgasms offer a fascinating middle ground between complete denial and full release. They're not just about teasing (though there's plenty of that). They're about maintaining that heightened state of arousal that makes chastity play so psychologically compelling.  A ruined orgasm happens when stimulation stops right at the point of no return, allowing ejaculation to occur without the satisfying rush of pleasure. Think of it as your body going through the motions while your brain gets left hanging. The result? Semen release, without the feel-good chemicals that typically flood your system during a full orgasm. The key difference from regular orgasms is what happens next. Instead of feeling satisfied and sleepy, most people remain aroused, frustrated, and ready for more. It's like having dessert that looks perfect but tastes like cardboard. Technically you got what you wanted, but somehow you're left wanting more. What does a ruined orgasm feel like? "Welp, that took the wind out of my sails" might be the most widely-recognized idiom that captures the feeling of a ruined orgasm. Picture yourself sailing toward your destination with wind filling your sails, the anticipation building as you gain momentum with each gust. The refreshing breeze carries you forward, everything aligned perfectly for a smooth arrival at your intended harbor. But then, just as you're approaching the dock with full speed and excitement, the wind suddenly dies. Your sails go slack, your boat loses its power, and instead of the satisfying arrival you were building toward, you're left drifting aimlessly in still water. The momentum that felt so promising just moments before has completely vanished, leaving you stranded somewhere between where you started and where you desperately wanted to be.  That sudden shift from anticipation and building intensity to an abrupt, unsatisfying halt is what defines a ruined orgasm.  What is the difference between a ruined orgasm and edging? Ruined orgasms and edging are two distinct experiences. Edging brings you right to the brink of orgasm (that 9.9 out of 10 feeling) and then backs off completely. No ejaculation, no release. Just pure, concentrated frustration that builds anticipation for next time. Ruined orgasms push past that point of no return but withdraw stimulation just as orgasm begins. Your body completes the physical process, but the mental satisfaction is squashed due to the sudden lack of stimulation. Both serve different purposes in chastity play, and many couples use them in combination to create increasingly intense experiences. "I try to edge myself but keep accidentally ruining orgasms. What should I do?"  Practice edging more, but start further from the edge. Using a 1-10 scale where 10 is orgasm, try staying at a 6 or 7 instead of pushing to 9. As you get better at recognizing the lower levels, you can gradually work closer to the edge. Treat accidental ruins as learning experiences rather than failures, because they're part of the process of developing better control! Why ruin a perfectly good orgasm? The appeal lies in what doesn't happen after. Regular orgasms typically trigger a refractory period where arousal drops and that submissive, attentive energy fades. Ruined orgasms allow for semen release while maintaining that heightened psychological state.  Many couples discover that ruined orgasms can actually intensify horniness and desire rather than satisfy it. Instead of feeling "done," the experience often leaves people more focused on their partner and eager to please. Are ruined orgasms a reward or a punishment? Again, depends on who you ask. Some view ruined orgasms as a reward. They get stimulation and release without losing that aroused energy. Others see them as delicious torture that keeps them focused on their partner. Both perspectives can be right within the same relationship, depending on context and mood. Here are some real-world experiences to broaden your POV: "The ruined orgasms took the edge off how horny he was, but he was still quite horny and had a very satisfying orgasm hours after his ruined orgasm. So, for us, it's not a reward or a punishment. It's an appetizer." "I think it's silly to pretend that there are 'technicalities' here. It is simply a question of the sub's response and perception. I fetishized ruins and would perceive them as a sort of punishment, but it's a punishment that I crave if it allows me to serve the Dom's cruelty more. I know a sub who was ruined after a long session and almost had a mental breakdown as a result. Master later told me that was a harsh punishment for his sub, and he wouldn’t take it so lightly next time. Dom must simply remain aware." "For me they are both rewards. I love to be edged by her or by me. To be constantly horny and aroused is the best. The ruined orgasm is just to release fluids that will come out at awkward times, but still keep me horny and complacent." "Ruining an O is much more detrimental to me personally so it's more of a punishment. Edging is the best! I want her to play with me all the time, and if she never lets me O, then I am staying up and active constantly. It is a win win for me. Short Version: Edging = Reward, Ruin = Punishment with a reward to get there." General tips for ruined orgasms Prioritize communication & consent. Establish boundaries and clear signals or safe words in advance. The sub should be able to communicate their arousal level on a 1-10 scale. Timing takes practice. Don't worry about "ruining the ruin." Remember this: try first, fail second, learn third.  Some find that using numbing agents like penis desensitizing sprays can help with delay and timing.  Three ways to ruin a chastity sub's orgasm 1: Manual hand stimulation only. Sit on your partner's stomach, reverse cowgirl style, and keep him in a flat, laying position. Tease his balls one by one, then start incorporating the penis. Body language is everything. The more he starts to move, the closer he might be to climax. Abruptly stop when he says he's about to cum and enjoy the pathetic dribble. For added humiliation, make him eat his cum from the bed and his cage.  2: Get behind your sub and get close to his body. Start with a wand vibrator on the penis tip only while pegging with an anal dildo from behind. When he comes close, remove the vibration but keep pounding until he starts to ejaculate out of his locked, non-erect cock. Keep penetrating him with the dildo to force out another dribble or four. You'll notice a lil' squirt with every thrust.  3: One couple plays an intense guessing game where the sub is let out of chastity for lengthy tease sessions. The Dom has mastered the line between edging and ruined orgasms so precisely that the sub often can't tell which occurred. Blindfolded and restrained, the sub must guess whether they were edged or ruined after each session. Edge guess correct: game continues.  Edge guess incorrect: punishment involves a full orgasm directly into their mouth, then back to the cage. Ruin guess correct: reward of a full orgasm in their preferred method. Ruin guess incorrect: must consume the ruined orgasm, game over, back to chastity.  To run or not to ruin an orgasm?  There's no universal playbook for chastity dynamics, and frankly, that's the point! What drives one person crazy might bore the next person to tears. The real pleasure often comes from surrendering that control, whether you've locked yourself up or handed the keys to someone else who gets to decide your fate. Happy National Orgasm Day to the CB-X chastity community. May the (sweet, sweet) misery be with you.